The Incident of the Broken Mug

Oddities 1 Comment »

There it lay; in pieces and scattered across the sidewalk. A normal caffeine bearing white mug mutilated and vulnerable: pedestrians oblivious to the story. Cars also cruise by in the busy Merriman Avenue. The origin of this mug seemed to have no immediate explanation. Thus, my mind went on an exploration to find the answer to this broken mug.

It was on a sidewalk next to one of the busiest streets in Stellenbosch. Students traverse this sidewalk many nights while in a stupor from a crazy night on the town. It’s just past the BP garage and McDonalds, whom many students claim as their final waterhole for the night. The past few nights were surprisingly cold, thus it could mean that a coffee addict could not let their cup go while on a mission to BP. Thus, in an attempt to perhaps greet someone, the mug slipped and died on the tar.

The building next to sidewalk was a block of flats. There were no big windows close to the mug, but only a small bathroom window a few feet away behind a cement wall. Why would someone throw a mug out of a small bathroom window? Was it perhaps to knock out a nemesis on the pavement? Whatever the reason, the eventuality of a mug flying out of an odour release latch seemed odd, yet entertaining.

Cars regularly cruise by in Merriman. There are rumours of drag races taking part in this straight long road. I’ve not yet witnessed this as it might be a myth or tradition of the past, however to stress the importance of cars in Merriman, it seems fitting. Perhaps on a late night drive home someone boozed up on office coffee struggled their way home in a Honda. In an act of apathy and sleep-induced confusion the overtime office worker slipped the coffee out the window. Perhaps it is even more far-fetched than the bathroom throwing incident, but much more realistic, in a working-class-late-night kind of way.

The easiest explanation is often the best explanation; however none of these thought experiments are very likely. The incident of the broken mug needs something much more fitting. A small part of me wants to accept the ludicrous and highly entertaining concept of someone deliberately breaking the mug on a strange spot to egg out creative lateral thinkers. Sometimes we miss all these details. I like making up stories for why things happen the way they do. Sometimes late at night when walking through the streets of Stellenbosch I witness many strange things and sometimes very normal things: people running across the street with big smiles, flowing hair and a sign of purpose and a goal – whatever it may be, perhaps meeting up with a good friend in the pub or the chance meeting of a crush. It makes me happy to know the world is alive and not stagnating.

The broken mug is a perfect example of this. If things were just normal and nothing broke, nothing got lazy, nothing got horny, nothing cried, nothing took vengeance, nothing made music, then the world would be a truly boring place. The inconsistency in human life is what makes life worth living for. Perhaps it’s just me, but when I see a flickering light in a corridor it makes me so happy, just like the mug, it is broken, but it shows character. Whatever the reason for the destruction of the mug, it served another purpose other than the brief eye-opener for the caffeine craver. It also opened my eyes.

SAMA’s 2009 – A shocker

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I spent my lazy Saturday night studying Mandarin while the SAMA’s were presented on SABC1. I didn’t get much too study though, because I was soon turned into a sponge to soak up the “real” South African Music Industry. Here I was thinking I “knew” the industry and its artists, but boy was I surprised.

I keep forgetting that I’m a minority in this country and my general market or music knowledge of South African music only stretches to rock and alternative music. A brilliant example of the shock I experienced was with the Best English Pop Album. I only knew about Jody, last year’s Idols winner. The rest was totally unknown: and yes, that’s the “POP” album, the one’s everyone’s supposed know about and despise in public and guiltily listen to in private.

The presenter, who did a great job, Trevor Noah, spoke in an African language that I didn’t know of, and I strangely felt disconnected from my own country. The crowd were laughing their asses off, and I was just bluntly staring at the screen, perhaps hoping to catch a glimpse of physical comedy so I can join in on the laughs.

I’m very much happy that Foto na Dans won Best Alternative Album: Afrikaans, Zebra and Giraffe won Best Rock Album: English and Goldfish won Best Dance Album as well as Best Producer. I was hoping for Goldfish to bag more awards though, especially Best Album of the Year.

Despite my sheer shock at the vast music industry that I’ve never even heard of, also made me excited. I really like music and I’m definitely going to go through those nominee lists now and try to listen to most of them. This country is diverse in its music, but I’ve only even began to scratch the surface. I feel like a kid in a candy store.

New Blogs/Posts

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Hello y’all!

I’ve been writing for some new sites and old sites again. Me and my twin brother have started a group blog http://twindie.net. Here we post about popular culture, but with a twist on it. It’s not been updated for a week or two and I apologizefor it. We’ll pick it up again soon.

I’ve also written a new blogpost at Leximo‘s blog. Read the post here. It’s about a Chinese woman that made me realize South Africa again.

Peace out,

Niel

P.S. – Also check out for a new 5 Things Game Have Taught Me article on Nerdmag soon!

Gmail haunts handicapped people

Internet 1 Comment »

Someone just pointed this out to me:

Create a new account for Gmail. (Yes, that unfortunately means logging out of your current Gmail. Gasp!) And when you get to the Captcha field press the button for the handicapped spot. Listen to that sound. It’s sound so creepy! How in the hell can anyone understand anything what is being said?

It reminds me of the drilling into hell video from Youtube. [Dislclaimer: Don't listen to this if you're easily scared!]

I bet Google has some subliminal messaging in there somewhere!

Spam Update

Internet 3 Comments »

After posting a blog about a ridiculous spam e-mail I got, Nic from FluffyPinkThing suggested I give the spammer a run. I decided to go ahead. Alas, it did not go very far, but I like to believe that the spammer laughed a little bit. After the first e-mail I replied:

Dear Peter Mpenza,
Sorry that I’m replying now. I was in a very strong financial position just a few weeks ago, but I just got laid off my job. I’m desperate for money right now. Never thought the recession would hit me. It’s just so unreal. Like a pig flying with a medievil sword ready to impale me once I go outside. Or Gollum stabbing me in the back. I need my Samwise Gamgee! Will you be my Samwise Gamgee?
What must I do claim that generous amount of premium? Cause I really have to buy myself a new car, since I had to sell my Bentley. I’m looking for a Rolls this time. Help me please!
Yours truly,
Harry Granger
Mr. Peter Mpenza then responded with a copy paste reply. He asked that I should trust him and that we should meet in person to close the deal. He also said:
I do not believe in theories,  I believe in practical, therefore your physical presence will be very important  to assure you that I am a man of impeccable character. If this goes well with you, I will need you to furnish me with this below information for us to forge ahead.

1.       Your full names.
2.       Your billing address.
3.       Your  telephone numbers
4.        And your profession.

Being a reluctant rich jobless man I replied:
Dear Peter Mpenza,
Sorry, but I do not believe in the practical. I believe in theories – but not any kind of theory, but conspiracy theories. I believe that the world will end in 2012. I believe that Bush is part of a lizard clan who lives underneath the Earth. I believe that the recent Chinese Earthquake in Sichuan was created by a huge weather control system. I believe that Darth Vader was Luke Skywalker’s father and I believe in the saviour of mankind – The One, Neo.
However, I can add that I believe you. My witch doctor has told me that someone will come forth and save me from my current predicament. However, he said I should be weary of chance takers and before I can assure the true depth of “man” I must see his face, for a face never lies. I did Navy work when I was a kid and they taught me that one can look into a man’s eye and know if he is a liar. Best life lesson I got at the tender age of 7.
So, please before we go any further with this transaction, I know I’m desperate, but I need to see your face. Can you please send me a picture of yourself? Any picture will do.
And see it as a double whammy. When I meet you we can recognize each other and not use codenames or phrases like, “Delirious owl is stalking the prey” and you would then answer, “The amorous badger has left the honey.”
That is just embarrasing.
Thanks for the cooperation,
Harry Granger
However, Peter Mpenza did not reply. Either 1) Peter saw through my mockery, 2) he scams so many people that he doesn’t have time for a chancer, 3) he is ugly and doesn’t want to send a pic or 4) my reply got caught by his spam filter.

First Nerdicle: 5 Things Games Have Taught Me

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I’m now currrently doing some guest posts at NerdMag and I’ve just posted my first article there: 5 Things Games Have Taught Me: Super Mario Bros.

Video games is a great to while away the time, but sometimes parents yap at you for not going outside and games that teach nothing but violence, but I protest. Games teaches me many things!

Hopefully I’ll try and keep it a regular feature there. Hope you enjoy the article.

Strange Twitter Source

Internet 4 Comments »

I recently replied to a friend on Twitter with the normal web interface. I always use the Twitter web interface. So when I checked my tweet it had a different source. Here is the Tweet. The source is in Japanese. Here is link to my supposed source. Luckily Google Translator came to my help, but now it even makes less sense.

 The trend now operating in shunitanOS twitter client. There is no deep meaning to the naming. Because of the public airwaves by the venom of the authors of the source is open source.

Public airwaves by the venom of the authors? What the hell? Am I part of closed beta without me knowing? I’m starting to suspect a Japanese conspiracy theory, but the Chinese are the Web Spies. Hmm… can anyone help me?

Foto na Dans @ Tollies

Music 2 Comments »

Ok, I’m going to slightly biased. I love Foto na Dans. Their live act is insane. Tight, epic and passionate. Le-Roi has an amazing voice.

Now Tollies is really random venue. Very unlike Foto na Dans, but I guess they were invited to play. The stage was very small, but they managed. The sound however wasn’t that great. Le-Roi’s vocals was a bit muddy.

They played a really random set: two new songs and Vergeet van My was not the set closer, rather 4th from last. Usually that’s the clincher, but Hou Jou Hand Bymekaar took the spot as set closer this time around. I haven’t seen them since the end of last year, but they do more crowd participation now, and it was especially apparent in Hou Jou Hand Bymekaar and Vergeet van My.

Despite a random set I will always enjoy Foto na Dans. They are doing new things with music and not just copying international trends with Afrikaans lyrics. Along with Lark, I rate them as the best local group in South Africa. Going to check them out at Coke Zero Fest. Really excited to see them on such a huge scale.

Video Game Shooting

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http://bit.ly/LF8o1

Go read and that.

The German teenager who shot dead 15 people including nine school pupils before killing himself played a violent video game hours before his gun rampage, reports said Saturday.

Investigators said Tim Kretschmer, 17, spent two hours playing Far Cry 2, a video game in which players hunt arms traffickers in the jungle, on Tuesday night, the news magazine Der Spiegel reported on its website.

The article is very vague in bluntly citing the causality between the recent German school kid rampage to video games, but it implies it – even with a sort of told you so air to it. Can we just start to grow up and not milk this really lazy way off blaming games for kid rampages?

Yes, it does add to the desensitization of the current generation, but so does movies, television, media and the Internet. It is everywhere. Video games often becomes the first scapegoat when teenagers or young children are involved in murder sprees. It is ridiculous sensationalism for the older generation who do not understand the medium. “Ye, young whipper snappers better stop playing dem video games, or you’ll kill your school” and then your grandfather proceeds to rap you on your knuckles.

The media needs to look at other avenues, before milking the mostly misunderstood gaming market. Seriously anyone that is going to kill people off callously is not psychologically sound. I play many video games, watch many violent movies, read many gruesome books but I will never go on a killing spree.

So please, playing video games does not equal instant deranged maniac. Thank you, now please get that into your heads, before I pull out my semi-automatic on my English Literature class.

Fail Spam

Internet 2 Comments »

This message leaked through Gmail’s spam filter today and neatly arrived in my inbox:

PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL.
…………………………

My name is Mr. Peter Mpenza, a South African, I am an employee of an Insurance Company called (Liberty Life Group). My position is the Senior Claim Adjuster for the Insurance Company.
During our last priminary auditions in 2007, I found out in my department that one of our client who insured his properties and life has died since two years ago that is in 2006. Since then, there was nobody that comes forward to claim his insurance premium which amounted to Eight Million Pounds Sterling (8,000,000.00).
Therefore, I am seeking for a reliable and trustworthy person that can act as the decease next of kin to make this claim for this above stated premium. Note that I shall provide all necessary assistance to make sure this premium is being paid out.
All documentation regarding this claim will be forwarded to you for presentation to the Insurance Company for further approval. If this goes well with you, we shall disburse the funds in accordance to an agreed percentage 50/50%. Note that this is absolutely confidential and upon your response, I shall explain explicitely to you for more understanding.
Please endeavour to contact me either by phone or email indicating your interest in this business proposition.
Yours truly,

Peter Mpenza.
Senior Claim Adjuster.

Wow. Epic fail. So, tell me Peter, are you looking for someone trustworthy to claim 8 million pounds? Over the Internet? Via email? Perhaps I would’ve trusted you more if your grammar was better.
“During our last priminary auditions in 2007″ – priminary?
“I found out in my department that one of our client who insured his properties and life has died since two years ago that is in 2006″ – What a horrid sentence!
“Since then, there was nobody that comes forward” – *came forward* and the nobody is just bleh. This whole sentence reeks of incompetence.
“Note that this is absolutely confidential and upon your response, I shall explain explicitely to you for more understanding.” – redundancy fail. It also sounds lolcat speak. I can has more understanding. Also please spell explicitly right.
“Please endeavour to contact me either by phone or email” – There is no phone number? Can I Skype you? This business proposition seems valid. MSN maybe? Then we can go PC2PC via webcam.
I cry myself to sleep  thinking that some people will actually get caught by this. The low grade English was just the icing on the cake. Oh, Google his name before you reply also. That helps.